all the pregnant ladies...

big sister learning to swaddle.

after what seemed like a million complications, we were finally able to get a group of pregnant women together for another round of pregnancy classes! while the first group was easy to round up and only seemed to grow week-by-week, this group took f.o.r.e.v.e.r. to come together. the average age of the women was much younger and of the 8, only two were first time moms.

i am shocked and awed by the lack of basic anatomical and physiological knowledge. above and beyond all of the pregnancy myths and legends and the crazy dominican "do-not-do-during-pregnancy" list, the question that hurt my heart the most was, "what does my period have to do with my pregnancy?"

meditation and relaxation techniques

we've always talked to teenagers about protecting themselves - using condoms, birth control, abstaining. in fact, i've been known to bring in carry-ons full of condoms for amalio to have on hand at school. just recently two of his (male) students asked for condoms, because in "their line of work" they need them, but they often don't have money to buy any. they're strippers.

it's hard to teach teenagers, and even adults, how to protect themselves from unwanted pregnancy if there isn't a working knowledge of how things work. and with all of the crazy rumors surrounding birth control, it's even harder.

pretty pregnancies (and jewel)

the question caught me so off guard because in my north american mind, everybody had some sort of human anatomy class in middle school, maybe high school. we all learned that the woman has eggs and a man has sperm and the two can meet up and form a baby, right? apparently not. as i asked around the group a bit, i realized that even in this hyper-sexual culture, women didn't know what their own body parts looked like on the outside! one woman asked how americans use tampons, because wouldn't pee get stuck inside of her? (tampon use is not common in latin america)

the new curriculum that we're working on will have all of this worked in on the first day of class. information and knowledge are power. when we know about our bodies, we can protect and care for ourselves and our loved ones.

thank you all for sharing this journey!!!

Pregnancy Education Success

it seems like so long ago that i started this crazy journey into cienfuegos, santiago - one of the most rumored neighborhoods of the city - to work in futuro lleno de esperanza's educational center. it's really only been a few short months -but my heart has been changed, softened and opened to this community, the people in it and its future. the doors started to open in so many ways, and in ways that already spoke to me. i've taken classes and read books and been supported in a way i had never imagined possible. me, the internet skeptic, has made friends online that encourage me and lift up this ministry in prayer. 

 six weeks ago i began, timidly, a class for pregnant women in the community. i walked and walked - knocking on doors and following paths, not sure what i would find. we had 7 women for our first class. i was sure they wouldn't come back. but they did. and we grew from 7 women to 12 women, all eager and ready to learn about their bodies, how to protect themselves and how to care for the babies growing inside of them. 

we had new mommies and experienced mommies. together we formed a community of support - sharing our fears and desires and hopes - not just for the babies, but for the neighborhood, for our lives and the futures of those around us.

it was a rocky class - i wasn't exactly sure what i was doing, trying to compensate for cultural beliefs and bizarre pre-natal practices here while informing and empowering these women to take care of themselves and their babies throughout pregnancy and childbirth. 

but, i'm counting it a success.

these women want to continue! they want more information. they want more power. 

we'll be continuing our "group" in september, along with a new 6-week preparation class for more pregnant mamas.

as soon as i convince my friend katie to help me (hi, katie!) we'll be offering class in Futuro Lleno De Esperanza's other centers that serve haitian communities.

during our last class we learned what will happen in the hospital and how to swaddle newborns.

we also re-touched the subject of lactation.

aurisleyda will have her baby girl at the end of august. 

swaddling.

diana is having her third baby - via c-section. she's been a blessing to the group with her knowledge of local herbs that increase milk supply.

as a present to the women in our class, i printed out a belly-picture. photos are not common here, nor is the celebration of pregnancy in lower-income communities. i wanted these women to have a reminder of their beautiful, power bodies!

i dug into my stash of craft supplies, and with help from my friend rebecca (thanks, rebecca) each woman made a picture frame for their photo. thanks aunt lisa for supplying with so much great paper and supplies!!!

pre-natal classes.

life is so full right now. it's overflowing with work and busy-ness and amazingly good things that have been a long time in the workings. when i moved to this country, i had no idea what was in store for me - and my first experiences were disastrous. i knew that i wanted to work in education and that i wanted to work in impoverished communities. what did that look like? no idea.

over the years, i started to pinpoint where my strengths and interests were and made plans. oh, did i make plans. but it wasn't time yet. but, in the past few months, things have started to come together and this time in our lives has been amazing. there's not enough hours in the days for everything, but it seems like nobody in our family is lacking - we have priorities and strategies to make sure we don't stray too far from what we think is important to us.

in a month, i'll begin a commitment with a school offering education in a neighborhood where many children don't even have birth certificates. and i've been working with the midwives, and there's another project in the works to create employment and skills-training for women. it's intense. but so fulfilling.

just two weeks ago, i started pre-natal education class in the neighborhood. soon i'll give all my faithful readers some of the socio-economic information from the area (but right now we're still surveying). money is pretty-tight/non-existent. but that doesn't mean that women are not entitled to know what is happening to thier bodies, what to expect from labor and delivery or how to care for their newborns. we saw a need, and are working to fill it. we want women educated about their bodies and how to best care for them.

we had six ladies at the first class, where we talked mostly about nutrition - anemia is rampant, so we wanted to talk about how to combat that.

the average age of the women was 19. the minors (under 18) were "first time moms" but the other three had already given birth to at least one other child.

the average gestational age was 6 months - and in the second class, where we had 10 ladies, 7 were 5 months pregnant, but one was just waiting to go into labor.

these mamas are excited. but they're scared as well. nobody has ever really told them what happens during birth. and no one could really explain why c-sections were so prevalent here (especially in the private clinics).

when we looked at pictures of uterus' and vaginas, they were like kids in a candy store. they had never been shown what their "lady parts" look like. they were in awe of how it all works together to grow and birth a baby.

all of these women are planning to exclusively breastfeed. we are out of the area of women who can afford a can or two of milk a week and believe that breastfeeding is a nuisance but are in a population that understands their economic situation could kill a child if it weren't for breastmilk.

i've been really inspired by the mujeres so far. for having little to no education about themselves and how their bodies work, they are doing their best to keep these bellies healthy - and i have high hopes that they were do their best to keep the babies healthy outside of the womb as well.

 

Childbirth Education

Five years ago, pregnant with my first child, I was introduced to the craziness that is pre-natal care and birth in the Dominican Republic. I fought hard and long against pointless c-section, but in the end, my son was delivered via surgery (and thank God he was) at almost 42 weeks of gestation. at every turn, i encountered hostility and tension - i wanted a natural birth, but, as a first-time mom, had no idea what i was up against. when i had pain in my belly, i was sent home and called a cry-baby and told "if you can't handle that pain, how will you handle child-birth. we can schedule the c-section now if you want"and so i went home, day-after-day with no explanation for my pain and insulted on top of everything.

the doctor never checked to see what was going on down there, and only sent me to get a special ultra-sound when i argued with her for it. finally, we spoke with the director of the clinic who sent us asap to a different ob/gyn who was convinced i wouldn't be able to give birth - and scheduled the c-section for the next morning. samil had the cord wrapped around his neck and was lucky to have been born at just the right moment.

i'm thankful for the second doctor who touched me, who calmed me down, who spoke to me like a person and not an animal. but the trials didn't stop then - finding a pediatrician who was pro-breastfeeding was impossible (we still haven't found one) and after my daughter was born and put under the lights for jaundice, we had to fight with the nurses to not feed her RIGHT BEFORE we showed up to breastfeed during visiting hours.

i became a crusader for breastfeeding - if the pediatricians weren't going to support it, i would. and i'd let women know all of the benefits of it - all of the information they weren't getting because the doctors were being bought out by the formula companies, i'd get it out. because that happens. and because doctors advocate formula feeding, many children in the dominican republic are being insufficiently fed to the point of severe malnourishment and even death.

i've been looking for a way to plug in this passion to the communities we work and live in, but have been at a loss. late last year, i plugged into a midwifery group from the USA that works here in the DR. i'm no midwife (yet) but these women, and the women i have met (online) through this connection, have encouraged me, supported me, and even sent me tons of books to get me started on the road to promoting healthy pregnancies, natural birthing and breastfeeding.

since december, i've forged a friendship with one of these ladies who has really egged me on, supporting my idea to start a pre-natal class at the school i work in in cienfuegos. she got me the resources, sent me links and videos and even sat down and typed out a whole class by class outline to get me started. i am so grateful, you cannot even imagine.

and with the midwives for the dominican republic, i've seen the real need and desire to bring this kind of education to the island. my friend who is the leader of this group is working to get healthy, natural births and breastfeeding into the hospitals. it's amazing to see all of this happen - the support there is for it, the power in women working together.

now! now, i will be putting all of this into practice. scary, i know. on june 9th, we start childbirth education classes at futuro lleno de esperanza - free to all the pregnant ladies in the community who want to know more about how their bodies work, how they can take care of it, how they can make labor a little more bearable and how to take care of their newborn once they're here. most of the interest i've had so far is from first-time teenage moms. the youngest is 13. when i began my crusade, i never realized where it would bring me - and this demographic is so much different than what i'm used to. i'll write about the "marriage" situation in a different post so you can understand more about why 13 and pregnant is a little more severe than "teen mom" on MTV makes it out to be.

i've found pre-natal vitamins for 1 peso a piece - that's like 2 cents. which is next to nothing, but still too much for many of our mamas. the plan is to dish out seven vitamins a class, in an attempt to insure attendance the following week. of course, we'll have snacks (what better way to get people together than food? it's universal, people). if you'd like to help out with this project, helping us to buy the pre-natal vitamins or even some of the snacks for our classes, please email me @ melanie @ gmail . com (without the spaces) and i'll let you know how you can do that!

empowerment.

this morning, after class, i visited the hospital again - things are starting to come together for the organization i've been working with, and together we've been clarifying what it is exactly that we can do to help.

what it all boils down to is sharing our gifts (well, their gifts, i'm just facilitating) so that the doctors and nurses that are already here can offer something different to the women.

it's not about coming in and taking over, or throwing money at a problem and hoping it goes away. it's about empowering people to do it themselves.

i've never been so focused on something for lent. i've always kind of given something up and given in halfway through, or "sacrificed" something that wasn't really a sacrifice. but instead of "giving up" this season, i've taken on and oh, it's changed my life.

i struggle so much with how to help - i am surrounded by poverty and distress. children with not enough food to eat. men and women ravaged by disease that can ostracize and humiliate. families with no electricity or running water.

and like many people, i want to do everything possible to take that baby, the one with a bloated belly and no clothes, and make life better.

but when i reflect on it, i know that taking babies from their homes is not the solution. it's just a way for me to soothe my own pain - not theirs. and giving a family food for one week will not feed them the next. shoes and clothes don't last forever, and what happens when they're outgrown?

so, it's about making me feel better about what is happening around me - but instead, finding ways to educate and empower a way out of poverty. about giving skills that will lead to nourishment - however that might look.

today, after i left the hospital, we headed to la vega to see an empowerment project in action and i am amazed. and inspired. and thankful. that people are taking the iniciative to form local based programs, empowering dominicans to take charge of the future.

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this lenten season, i'm reflecting on how to give without creating dependency; how to give with a faithful and servant's heart and how to let go once i give material things away. i come in contact daily with people who have way less than me, who are hungry and tired and un-bathed. join me as i begin to work through it. check out all of the posts under the label "lenten reflection"

 

post-partum reflections.

i wrote about visiting the public hospital's maternity ward awhile back - i haven't just let it lie like so often happens around these parts (these parts = my heart). i am so scared sometimes of being vulnerable, that i just steer clear. i am involved in a number of activities - most just peripherally, one (another post when i can.... oooo, vague) way more intimately. but seeing the conditions, talking with the teenage moms-to-be, holding the babies... it touched me in a way i just haven't been touched in a long time.

i've always had a soft spot for mom's - especially teen-age ones - but it wasn't until i had my own that i knew that this is where my heart was. i had been given tools before we even thought of having children that would make our lives as a family easier (not easy!), and even though i didn't have this impoverished birth experience, i also didn't have a luxurious one. i knew what i wanted and what is good for babies. i was able to choose a doctor, to express opinions and concerns.

that doesn't always happen in the public hospital, and it happens much less frequently for under-educated teenagers.

i've been back to the hospital a few times. i don't really have any sell-able skills to offer, but i'm really good at encouraging women to breastfeed (that's another post for another day!) and just talk to them about their concerns. i like talking to the nurses to find out what is going on and where we might be able to find more help for these women.

my creole is crap, but a quick prayer usually brings a smile to mom's face.

i took my dad to the hospital in december to hand out some diapers and sanitary pads to the recien paridas - i also cleaned out our closets and took ten sheet sets and some baby blankets. it was heartbreaking, really, to see babies lying on sheet-less hospital beds - no incubators, no separate space for mom to relax and sleep before heading home to countless, sleepless nights. no on-call nurse system for a quick injection of pain medicine.

i don't know what this looks like for the future - but i know that it is where i need to be. where i need to be present as some encouragement for the patients and nurses. i hope to get more involved, but i just don't know how that looks. i continue to work with the midwives for the dominican republic, and hope to become more involved as they establish themselves more in the country.

if you know of any place to get post-partum info that i could study, or anything that might be of benefit to new moms, please let me know!

re: the maternity ward.

i've been to the public hospital tons of times. visiting friends or dropping things off, i even run through the front door and out the back when i'm too lazy to walk around the block. i've been to a meeting or two and use the pharmacy because it's much cheaper than privately owned drugstores.

i don't visit people in the hospital. i feel like if you are sick, you need to rest, not entertain. and i'm not even big on visiting people after they give birth - unless they ask, or need help with lactation stuff. i like to wait until they're at home, comfortable and... more properly cleaned and presentable for visitors.

public health care here is kind of a joke. like many other public services, there are not enough funds, a little to no accountability to the people who manage what there is. doctors show up late, or not at all, spend little time with each patient and run on to their better paying job. nurses are paid minimum wage, and are not given the tools they need to perform their jobs.

even knowing all of this, even having experienced the public hospital, i was not prepared for the maternity ward. and on one hand i wish i had taken photos, and on the other i'm glad i didn't.

a friend of mine is a midwife working with midwives for the dominican republic and she brought onesies and sanitary pads for the new mamas in the hospital, so we headed over and talked our way in. normally, no one is allowed to accompany the women into the labor room, so it was a privilege to get in and see how it works.

picture taken from midwives for the dominican republic

we were thrown some disposable gowns and told we could walk around and talk to the women. good thing, because no one else seemed to be talking to them. the room was large, about 15 beds filled it up, each with a woman in some stage of labor - two beds were occupied by two women, since there was no space for them anywhere else. some of the beds had sheets, if the women brought them from home, most did not. a few of the women were naked from the waste down, with just a rolled up towel to give them privacy. there are no curtains to separate the beds. a doctor and his residents walked around, checking each woman. mostly, they didn't converse with the patient, and in one case the doctor did a tactile without even saying hello the mama-to-be.

one young girl cried and her belly contracted, with no one to hold her hand or give her words of encouragement. she had been admitted eventhough she was not really ready to be in the hospital. she might have lasted a day or two more without giving birth.

alone. in a hospital.

the babies are taken away after delivery and the women are shuttled to post-partum where they wait for... whatever one waits for in the post-partum room. again, these women are alone - not even with their babies for company.

no sheets, no hospital gown. no husband or mom to hold a hand.

the regular rooms were not much better, but here, company is allowed. four beds and a private bath in each room. babies and moms are reunited, but there are no cribs or incubator boxes for the newborns. they share the twin bed with mom and whoever else is with them - there are only seats if you bring them with you.

there are no free diapers, no blanket to wrap the baby in. no sheets on mama's bed or a pillow to use. no chairs for visitors. no sanitary pads or protection for the bed. no pain medication. for the haitian women, there is not even a nurse or doctor who speaks their language.

i spent an hour. it felt like a lifetime. i am thankful for this experience. for the opportunity to remember that not everyone lives like me, and that most are denied what should be basic rights of human beings.