the hardest thing

stepanie. i miss you!

 people often ask me what i miss the most about living in the good old u.s of a. and the answer is... not much.

i miss real pizza, hoagies and tastykakes. i miss my family, obviously, and most of the events that are important - like my grandfather had heart surgery at the same time my eldest cousin gave birth to twins a few weeks early and my goddaughter broke her back. it would have been nice to be there, right?

i miss hot water and never having to worry about if the lights will turn off when i'm doing something important. and i never ever thought i'd say this - but i miss SEPTA and the CTA.

but what is most difficult is not what i miss from home... but what i miss from here.

not everyone who decides to pick up and move to another country plans to stay there forever... or even for a very long time. so, sometimes you meet amazing people, spend time with them, and then. well. then you're left to find new friends.

well, not quite.
but it is really hard to let people go - there is way more coming and going than there would be in a stateside life. and, believe me, when new people come around, you have to deal with a lot of newcomer crap. so, i've found, it's about figuring out how to choose people. which is not necessarily about choosing the people who are coolest, or richest or the most fun - sometimes the crazy is good, too. and sometimes you get it right and you know that the time that you spent with that person was worth it... and, well, sometimes you get it wrong and you feel like you've wasted a lot of time.

working at the university has brought a lot of newcomers in and out. working in ministry is also a revolving door. but, i think my life is enhanced by these "visitors" even if it sucks when they leave.